unsullied's Blog

It's funny how it has its ups and downs, isn't it? I admit I like to read horoscopes, and I like the silly forecasts about how each part of your life will be doing. It's true that things are rarely ALL going well. Wouldn't that be a nice thing to aspire to? My primarily problem is being stressed about the things I don't like. I do try to change them sometimes, but often fall back into the same habits (eg procrastination). Old habits really ARE hard to break, aren't they? I suppose I'll become one of those adults like every other one, with weird habits and perhaps prejudices and problems. Hard to stay self-aware! Here's how my life is going in a nutshell:

Romance: great!!! Things are going very well with the BF. Still trying to get used to the idea that he likes me and I like him and it's all dandy. Not used to having sex so much, it's a VERY nice change!! No pictures, I've decided not to post for the next while, sorry folks!

School: Meh. Learning a lot, but it's busy and I'm procrastinating. I only have until April and then I'll be free, so I'm trying to keep that in perspective. I am really hoping I won't be stuck waiting tables again once I graduate. With the current job market who knows how easy it'll be to get a job in my field.

Work: Bad! Trying to work up the nerve to quit. Almost did today but I'm such a chicken and take pains to avoid awkward situations. I realize I'm a bit of stress-head already, but the crazy work environment isn't helping.

Finances: looking good thanks to my hard work earlier!! It won't last forever though, I realize. I hope everyone is doing ok with the current crappy economy in many countries.

Health: Keep getting sick, in part because I don't get enough sleep and have been eating poorly (the former being common, the latter being a bit more rare). It's so cold though, who feels like a salad when it's gonna snow?

Xmas: CAN. NOT. WAIT for Christmas!!!! May or may not be able to afford a trip, but I look forward to spending time with my family regardless. Isn't it Thanksgiving weekend for you folks in the US? Happy Thanksgiving! It's weird to me that it's so late in the year, Christmas stuff is already starting up here. After this I guess it's officially time to start thinking about Christmas shopping!!!! I get stoked about it, partly because I don't spend too much so it's nothing to stress over.

Okay, not much more to add. Except that my actual horoscope today said I had a good day with work/my profession in general, which is a total lie!!!! Can't twist that around in my head to make it work at all

Hope you're all well, happy Saturday night

So, i guess lots has happened in exactly two months! I've been pretty MIA of late as I start my last year of the program I'm in. It's been crazy and busy and I moved apartment again, and things have looked up for sure!

Another guy I'd met and dated briefly at the beginning of the summer made a reappearance in September, and believe it or not I actually have a boyfriend now! After four years it's about time. I won't speculate on the future too much, so for now I'll focus on being happy and not procrastinating *too* much on all my homework!

As for my presence on NN, I feel really conflicted now that I am dating someone. Is it okay to have an account like this and keep it private? Should I not talk to people as I used to and limit myself to chatting with friends? Should I post pictures or even delete some? I don't know what to do!! I've never had this dilemma, but don't think I would be comfortable sharing this website with a significant other. If I shared it too soon, it might scare them off, and if shared too late it might be seen as being unfaithful. Does anyone have thoughts on this?

Anyways, I hope you're all doing well. It's definitely getting chilly in Toronto, though it's been mixed in with absolutely gooorgeous fall days with blue skies and bright yellow leaves! I'm really enjoying myself

I'll try to post more regularly on what I've been up to. I've been avoiding posting about the budding romance in case things got all screwed up (which they might still, who knows really?!). I'm excited for Halloween, but still don't know what to dress up as. Any costume ideas?

xoxo

Okay, so total change of events means that I'm actually not so peachy keen as my last post.... the guy I've been seeing called things off because he couldn't get serious. At least he didn't have sex with me. He cancelled plans and then ignored my texts for a couple of days, but at least he got back to me eventually with a thoughtful e-mail. I thought I'd be left hanging and ignored completely! I wish he hadn't continued things for almost 3 months before deciding he wasn't up to it. I feel fooled, since usually I'm quite slow to show affection....

Anyways, guess it's back to the internet dating scene for me. I'm feeling less enthusiastic and more jaded now. My summer romance is over, but hopefully fall will bring in a new breeze, full of some new possibilities. You can tell I'm trying to be philosophical about this, but I have two brownies, some kleenexes and some Jane Austen films waiting for me, so excuse me while I go try to get over my first "break up" in a while!!! :'S

I figured since I posted a couple of pics I should write a little blog about what's been going on. Life is hectic but sweet, and I'm experiencing a bit of change, which will be nice to ring in the fall. Fall always makes me so nostalgic, but walking down the street in the sun, feeling slow and lazy, listening to the cicadas from the park across the street, I remembered that summer can feel nostalgic as well!

I'm moving apartments, and hopefully soon quitting my awful job and getting something part-time during the school year (which starts in only a couple of weeks!) I'm moving in with yet another stranger, so hopefully we end up getting along.

My internet dating has ended with me focusing on one guy who I really like, so I have my fingers crossed that things will continue on being as awesome as they are. Still no sex yet after more than two months of seeing each other fairly regularly - the anticipation is woooonderful! I am someone who appreciates a bit of foreplay- not just in the bedroom, but before things have even made it in there! The current dating climate seems to suggest that people expect sex after just 3 dates, and often rush into things without a hint of build-up, so I feel like a lucky girl to have found someone who knows how to play!

That just about sums up my life at the moment - hopeful and ready for some change! Hope you're all enjoying the last days of summer, it really is too bad that it's so short in Canada, but boy have we gotten our share of heat! I don't think I'll mind some crisp fall days and a pair of cute mittens when the time comes!!!

xoxo

So, still doing the internet dating thing, though I've focused in on a few people that seem nice, so we'll see what happens! I'm trying to stay all "cool, whatever, if things don't work out that's fine" but I've rarely done the dating thing, so I feel like a high school girl getting all jittery about dates

On a completely different note, recently I've been looking into getting some sort of other piercing. I only have my 2 earlobes, which is pretty average, and got them when I was maybe 10 or so. I remember the whole thing, but that was back when using earring guns and rubbing alcohol were acceptable for piercings, and now they're not! I'm not young and doing it out of impulse just because I'm old enough, and I fancy ones that are mostly hidden, since I can't wear piercings in class and prefer them as a private expression rather than an in your face one. Anyways, so here's what I was thinking:

Another earlobe hole - just one on one side, so I can use all the cool little earrings I have when I lose one but have the other, like this gold spider one or a plethora of different coloured fake gems!

Bellybutton - after going to the gym, my stomach is looking sliiightly better, and I think I would feel sexier with one of these. Downside is the long healing time.

VCH - That is, "vertical clitoral hood". Yeah. Going from ears to a needle right above my clit....shudder...but apparently these heal really fast, the skin there is thinner than earlobes...and I kinda think they look HOT. I would get a barbell with gems on it probably, once it all healed. How do you folks think these look? Hot? Helpful way to point out the right spot? Gross and unsanitary?? I'm curious to hear what you think, and if anyone else has one of these.

In other news, it's hot right now in Toronto, and I've been working a lot, but I enjoyed a great Canada day out in the sun at least! Happy belated Canada Day to all my fellow Canucks, and a Happy Independance Birthday to anybody from the US as well! Look at us, sharing a birthday weekend! There were lots of tourists from across the border this weekend, in part because it was the Pride Parade on Sunday, which I had to miss because of work, but I totally dressed up rainbow-coloured!! While I'm straight, I'm not really your typical vanilla girl, since I appreciate posting here, and well as a bunch of other more kinky things, so I really support acceptance of sexual practices, and celebrating sexual diversity. One girl at work is bissexual, and an older woman tried to tell her she was "too young to know that" and basically laughed in her face. This is the same older woman that tried to rate me on an attractiveness scale....ARGH. Some people, they're just so clueless about sex and sexuality. I'm so glad I grew up in an open peer environment that celebrated that kind of thing. I feel really lucky!

Anyways, enough blabbing, hope you're enjoying your Julys so far!!! xoxo

Oh, internet dating. How weird and xxxxxx you are!

Buuut, my roommate has convinced me to give it a try and so here I am on "plenty of fish", hoping to find some potential fish in good ol' TO. I've been on a couple of dates already, and it actually hasn't been that bad! I have never really ventured into the online dating world like this before, with the intention of finding someone I can click with and date long-term.

Having had that recent bad experience with a dumb boyfriend, I am convinced that there must be some nice guys out there for me, who enjoy travel and adventure instead of being boring. It's also nice to have a social life again and do some fun things A bonus is that I also bought some new clothes, so I get to feel hot and witty again. I was feeling old and uncool in my old clothing, and depressed about the weather, so I'm very happy about the change. It's almost short skirt weather!!

So a colleague at work the other day decided to ask me and this other dude how we "rated" ourselves on the hotness scale, from one to ten...which was kind of a weird topic of conversation. Anyways, she rated herself a 5, and when the two of us wouldn't cooperate she decided to make up ratings for us too. I guessed an 8 - I'm no totally bombshell, since I've got a nose that's a bit small for my face, among other complaints, but I'm not that bad, I don't think. But she basically laughed in my face and was like "you go girl, have confidence! I think you're a 7, but I guess your beauty comes from the inside. Always good to aim high!"

Am I wrong in thinking that's a really overly honest and mean thing to say? I don't really need someone to tell me I'm not all that good-looking >_> She rated the other guy a 6!! Sometimes there are ways to be too honest.

Anyways, has anyone ever asked you this, or doled out a number for you whether you asked or not? I gotta say it was a blow to my pride, since while I'm not a perfect 10 I'd say I'm not bad, and I love being an A student, so not being an "A" in looks would rankle me Maybe I'm looking for an ego stroke posting this on here, but ugh, it got me pretty down. I'm supposed to be in my prime! Back to the gym for me!!!

I'm finally done school as of a few weeks ago, hurray!!!! I've been working a lot since, but now that the beautiful Canadian spring weather has arrived, I'm feeling re-energized, motivated, and more than a little bit horny

I called things off with the boy I've been whining about a lot lately. Turns out him and I just don't work out at ALL- mainly in bed, but also in the giving-lots-of-unwanted-advice department, or the doesn't-have-time-for-me-despite-having-no-current-job department. Phew!! The huge crushing weight of frustration and disappointment has been lifted, and I wanna get out and have fun again! I don't think that will necessarily mean crazy wild sex with people I don't really know (though I have ALWAYS wanted to check out that sex club Wicked in Toronto, and I AM living here now!), but whatever happens, I'm looking forward to it. I know I'm "only 26", but I feel a real desire to get my life going, both with relationships and work. My first priority is to relax and recover from school, try to deal with stress at work (it's a high-stress job for long hours, alas), and most importantly, reconnect with friends! I smell picnics, afternoon teas and martinis on the town! At least I hope so anyways, because I realize I haven't had time to see any friends at all and I've lost touch, even though I'm physically closer than ever. I'll have to get on that.

Hope you're all doing well! Brits and Commonwealth peeps: I am very excited for Will and Kate to visit Canada this summer, and I wanna go see them. I hope that doesn't make me a bad person. With any luck a small vacation will be in order!

Oh, and I fiiinally took some more pics! They're kind of quick and not that inventive, but it's a start!!!

Ugh, just 2 more weeks of school left, and I'm done for the summer! That's mean I get to work myself to the bone all summer to pay for next year's tuition etc, but it'll be so nice to enjoy the warm weather of spring and have a day or two here and there to laze (which I haven't done in a loooong time!)

Just thought I'd say hi, since I've been MIA from NN in the past quite a few months. I feel bad, but I know my "real" life takes over sometimes, and that's for the best! After all, which is more important, school or masturbation? A tough choice, I know!

As many of you know, I spent two years living in Japan around the Osaka area. I've gotten a bunch of PMs, so just wanted to let everyone know I *am* back in Canada, and that all my friends around Japan are safe for the time being.
Everyone is nervous and scared, watching the TVs for information about the nuclear reactors, but I guess for those of us who aren't in Japan all we can do is watch and wait, and thank the heroic workers who are searching for the dead and missing, or trying to stop a full-blown nuclear meltdown. I don't know what I would do in such a situation, but all of the hardest hit coastal towns remind me a lot of where I was living.

Anyways, thanks for the PMs of concern. Otherwise I'm doing okay these days - got myself a part-time job, so I am busy as a full-time student and working on weekends. Thank goodness there's only about a month left before I'm done for the summer, I really need a break!! Hope you're all doing well. xoxo